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Half the man I used to be. Well, technically, I am about 43% of the man I used to be—if my grade school math is still any good.

I have had people tell me I look like half the man I was. That always reminds me of Al Pacino in Scent of a Woman, when he is yelling at the snotty rich bastards that if he was “the man he used to be” he would take a flamethrower to the Baird School. I am not the man I used to be. For the most part, it’s good, but there are some negative parts of losing this amount of weight. For one thing, I have had to buy all new clothing several times. I went from wearing a 9XL shirt and tight 76 waist pants to a 2XL and 42 inch pant size. I know, I know…it’s a good problem to have, but the expense has been huge. When you go the big and tall store, they know you have limited options and charge accordingly. Just a standard pull over hoodie is going to be $50. To top it off, if you get into a nice dress shirt it will run an easy $65 plus. So, I have had to buy new clothing a few times.

On the plus side, I am able to fit into other things…like my car. It’s nice to drive my car and not have my gut rubbing against the steering wheel. One of the reasons I drive a mini van is because of the large doors. This was a concern for me, so I bought a mini van. It drove like a car but was big enough for me to be comfortable. I know that driving a soccer mom mini van hurts my street cred, but I can take it because I also own a 4X4 pick up (complete with gun rack and shiny wheels) so my male ego could handle the shot to my masculinity.

One of the other negative aspects of this kind of weight loss is losing a bit of my own identity. I always identified myself as “the big guy”. It’s a mental adjustment, not being the biggest person in the room.

Don’t get me wrong—the benefits completely outweigh the negativity of losing the pounds.


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