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The agency I work for has a “wellness” committee. I believe that this is a trend in many organizations as they attempt to slow down rising heath costs. The committee is made up of several well-meaning people that really seem to care about the people we work with (which makes them better people than me). This committee has asked me several times to write an article for the wellness newsletter that goes out the staff. These articles are about people’s health challenges, and what they have done or are doing to deal with it. One of my friends chronicled her battle with cancer and her treatment and ultimate remission. I read the article and was amazed what she had to deal with and how brave she was in writing the article and opening that up to everyone she worked with.

Up to this point, I have declined the offer. I have had a hard time getting my mind around why anyone would be interested. I also didn’t figure it was something I wanted to share with the people I work with because it seemed a bit to close to home. Kind of like stealing your neighbor’s newspaper, it seems like an easy thing to do, but the amount of grief you get if you get caught isn’t worth the reward.

I am currently tempted to take them up on the offer and do the article, if only to put to rest some rumors about my weight change. I have heard that I had gastric bypass, I heard that I had cancer and was getting treatment, I have heard that I was taking some new type of diet supplements. I am not sure why I care, but if people are going to make up stories and spread rumors about me, I wish they would make up good ones. In fact, I would like to get a few going myself: 

  1. I have started a lobby to name oatmeal raisin cookies the official scourge of the cookie jar.
  2. I have a blessing tattoo that I received in Tibet from a monk…in a very private place.
  3. My IQ is 163.
  4. I was on the 1984 US Olympic hockey team that won gold against the Soviets as a back up goalie, but unfortunately never played.
  5. I have been asked to no longer run with the bulls, because my presence makes the bulls too nervous to run.
  6. I am a trained sniper with 14 confirmed kills.

Maybe, just maybe, I can get some traction on my new rumors.

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One Comment

  1. Personally I’m going to start one on your behalf that you are an international spy working to infiltrate the well documented Oregon Mafia.


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